NEW BEGINNINGS

I'm making it just before midnight...but I am making it.....finally.

Today I am 48. It's hard for me to believe. It was just 2 years ago when my life got away from me. I was doing so well and then the heart attack. I thought it was just panic or stress. Guess not. It scared everyone but worse me. The heart can be mended ( great docs) but the after effects...not so easy. At least for me.

I stopped living...but the funny thing is life keeps moving even if your not moving with it.

So much happened in those two years and I look at it now almost like in a dream state. I was there.....but it felt like I was outside looking in. Someone else's life I was watching. Kinda hard to explain. Fear...dread.. always looking over my shoulder. Since I know there is still more work to be done..when will the other shoe drop and I'm back in the hospital. Will I make it next time?? It was a close call last time. Recovery isn't easy sometimes, it can be a rough road. Physcially and mentally.

But in the last 2 months something changed... not sure how or when it happened....the veil was lifted. I feel more like me again.

So here I am..ready again...starting all over.