Being a Kid Again

Yesterday I realized I had forgotten how to play.
And all it took was for Desi to remind me that I'm not old. JEEZ I'm not 50 yet..and even thats not old.
At first I didn't know why or when it happened but I do know....
Work, school, bills,medical issues, kids....LIFE, or maybe how I percieved my life.
I know now that I didn't take the time to enjoy the little things and even some of the big things in my life.
I was busy!! I've been in a hurry all my life...even when there's no need.
Still am. I've rushed home from work even when the house is empty. Why?? Who knows. Patience has never been a virtue of mine.


Anyway, I thought about all this as I watched my 1 1/2 yr old grandson take in the wonders of the playground. When's the last time I played??? Really played?? Wow... with his dad when he was the same age, the summer before I started nursing school. And even though Tony and Anjelika came along later, I was wrapped up in keeping up with family, work etc. Too busy to enjoy. Its sad really. I feel sad for Tony and Anjelika more than anything. They missed out on the real me. Though they had a great childhood...they only saw glimpses of what and who mom was.
I could give the excuse that I was 21 and naive as to what lay ahead. That summer was fantastic. I was excited about starting nursing school and I had taken the summer off from working to spend time with Damien before I had to put him in daycare. Every day was play day. Picnics in the park, drawing, walks in the hood, reading stories to him, and acting like I was 5 at the park. By 5 pm we were ready for dad to get home from work and play some more. David still hasn't lost that playfulness. But I did.


So yesterday ...I played. I played with Desi like I did that summer with his dad.


I went down every slide that park had, swung on the swings, climbed everything. I even went throught the round wire tube that Damien cautioned me " Mom maybe you shouldn't go in there" Hey I fit...so I crawled right through and Desi followed laughing at his silly Mima.

I want to play more often. In life and in my art. Damien and Desi came by today. As David and Damien hung out and ran an errand. Desi and I did watercolor paintings as we sat in the grass with the sun shining down on us. Well.. I watercolored and he basically got watercolor paints all over himself , some did end up on the paper, and then dumped the pail of water all over his clothes.

Ahhh. but ain't life grand??

Ps..I am planning on using our masterpieces as a background for something...just don't know what yet.